At the Expense

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I’ve learned when you say yes to something, you’re simultaneously saying no to something else. 

Distractions seem to have come in at all angles as of lately. 


There are a lot of attacks specifically on marriages. In the midst of the times, don’t forget to spend time with your spouse.


We can easily become distracted in our marriage. Anything that will divert your time/energy away from your marriage is dangerous. Energy poured out into ministries, voluntary work, careers, kids (yes, even kids…especially kids), friends, etc. These are essential and important but not as vital as investing time and work into your marriage. If your focus is on any of these AT THE EXPENSE of your marriage, it would be best to reprioritize and realign.


Our family is a blended family. My husband and I have 7 children altogether. So, we’ve had our share of having to reprioritize every single time there’s a hiccup in our marriage. Naturally, it feels “right” to put our children first, especially in a blended family setting. It took some time to adjust because of the dynamic of how my husband and I raised our kids in our previous marriage. In the growth process, we’ve had to readjust how and what would work to best fit our new blended family.


As the years went by, we quickly learned that no matter the circumstance - good or bad - those sets of eyes and ears were watching. WE are the role model of a Godly Husband & Wife, or at least we strive to be that example. It may sound silly to some but it is important to my husband and I  to show our love and affection towards eachother in front of our kids. Not all the time, silly🙃 Our goal is to show them and have them see love in action. There’s so much hate in our world today and this generation is feeling it outside of the home already. We can’t control what goes on outside of our home but we can certainly control what happens inside.


Our lives are far from perfect and our children have seen the arguments and the heated disagreements. The important part is that they also see the forgiveness afterwards.


If you’re reading this and you feel like you’re disconnected from your spouse, I encourage you to go out on a date or take a vacation/staycation alone somewhere. And don’t feel bad doing it without your kids! It is very important for your marriage to be healthy for the sake of your kids and everything below your marriage [work, ministry, friends, family].


Go out and talk about the weather! Be silly! Have fun! Turn your phones off! Enjoy eachother. 


And remember, what you say yes to (job, volunteering, church, ministry, etc.), you’re also saying no to something else that may very well need more attention (your marriage).


God bless,

Kim

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